What the hell did I watch

I finally got around to watching Green Lantern because it was free on TV, LOL. I never saw it in the theater because it looked terrible and I didn't feel it merited an $8 investment. I was right.

Naturally, spoilers will follow. I would say avert your eyes, but you prolly won't care.

Ryan Reynolds. WTF. It was like, "What if the ring chose a doofball frat boy dbag to be a hero?" Whereas I think Tony Stark is arrogant but likeable and highly intelligent, Hal is like derp.

The outer space scenes were terrible. It looked like bad animation you might see on Adult Swim at 2:30 in the morning. When he is standing in front of the sun to lure Parallax, I laughed out loud. Also, the scene where he devises a racetrack for the crashing helicopter was just awful.

Hector Hammond couldn't be taken seriously with the super encephalitic head. Surely there had to be a better way of doing the makeup for that. The character had tons of potential but it never got there. When he gains telepathy and flips the snotty kid out of the chair, I was excited. But that was pretty much the best of it.

The flashback scenes with dad were uber corny.

Dying Blake Lively's hair to make her a brunette is not enough to convince me that she is a badass pilot and savvy businesswoman.

The mid credits scene of Sinestro turning bad is about the only thing of interest to me. If they do a reboot, he is worth keeping.


In sum, this is nowhere close to a Marvel film. Chalk and cheese. Watch Loki beam out of the tesseract or Iron Man, Captain America, and Thor doing battle and then watch Green Lantern. It's like, "Uh, hellz no."