You ahh outta here!

Had lunch with a friend today and we were kvetching about this and that. Mostly work stuff. I made her laugh out loud several times as I regaled her with stories of what our first day back was like. And how one idiot dressed in a crushed blue velvet Austin Powers suit complete with a cravat. (A cravat, bitches. A cravat.) When I told Jon about it, he goes, “That first day would also be my last day.” Me too. The fact that he has stayed makes me think of Loki’s speech in The Avengers: “How desperate are you that you call on such lost creatures to defend you?” Anyway, she was telling me about a dude at her office who thinks he’s Charles Atlas. He finds any opportunity to wear skin tight clothing and flex his muscles. He got up during a company meeting, leaned against the wall, and flexed his biceps for everyone, LOL. She also said he frequently name-drops and talks about his days as an actor in TV commercials. Funny enough, no one can verify any of this information. She said he’s from Chicago originally and has an uppity attitude about Oklahoma: everyone here is an idiot, this whole region is beneath him, Chicago is phenomenal, blah blah blah. I laughed and said, “I used to date an idiot who lived in Chicago for a while and he too thought it was the shining beacon. I finally decided, You know what, pal? You think it’s so damn great, why don’t you go back there? Matter of fact, I’ll buy your plane ticket back today. Ta-dow!” (www.youtube.com/watch?v=6jUgWCAXxTQ That offer still stands by the way; I think Oklahoma would be better if he left and airfare to O’Hare ain’t that expensive.) I remember going to London and singing “Born in the USA” in the bathroom of Gordon Ramsay’s restaurant. I personally think we have it pretty good here and it boggles my mind when people act like living in a big city is an automatic marker of intelligence, poise, and relevance. You can be stupid as hell anywhere on Earth as far as I’m concerned. I don’t think her colleague is going to survive very long in the office because he’s already trash talking the area and its residents in front of clients. Call me crazy, but insulting people as you are trying to solicit business from them is not particularly smart.

I have a date next week and I’m kind of like blerg about it. The guy was after me before and during my time with Darcy but I’m a one man woman. I don’t cheat and I don’t tolerate being cheated on. Once you decide to be exclusive, both parties need to abide by the rule. So I turned him down and explained that I was with someone. He found out we split and here he is again. So you’re probably asking, “Why so blerg about it? Sounds like this guy is actually pursuing you.” The truth is that I get a sales pitch vibe from the guy. Like, “Da da da da da da da da Circus!” (www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQ3A7P3k8mI) Seems like there’s probably more smoke and mirrors there than actual substance. I could be wrong but that’s the initial impression I get. I’ve been known in times past to take a sow’s ear and want so badly for it to become a silk purse. This is just a meal and then me going home to take care of my workout.

Speaking of which, I’m doing well so far. Sticking to eating clean and I completed my first week of UDT. Yesterday, I was so sore I couldn’t do anything. Not even walk the dreadmill. My everything hurt. As much as I hated to do it, I felt like it would be wiser to rest and stretch out on the heating pad than wind up tearing or pulling something and going through the prolonged down-time of recovery. I feel much better today. It was the right thing to do. The start of Week 2 was tonight. I was both proud and stunned by my progress. That's not to say I won't have DOMS tomorrow but I knocked out a good workout tonight. Some of my lifts I was able to increase the weight by 50% which I think speaks to both the benefit of resting when you are beat down and the potential for muscle memory. Your brain goes, "Oh yeah. I remember how to deadlift. I remember how to balance the bar on the shoulders for a barbell squat." And you are off to the races faster than the first time around. Thank God for that.