If 2011 was an uphill battle at every turn, 2012 was a year of attempting to rectify bad decisions. Identify bad habits and patterns and smash them. This is what I wrote of 2011 at the start of 2012:
2011 was a time where nothing was easy or straightforward. Everything was a struggle, every deed seemed cloaked in subterfuge. Let this be a year where things are not so dramatic and not an uphill climb at every turn.
Oy. 2012 was not as glass smooth as I had hoped. But honestly, that's OK. Sometimes you don't appreciate what you have until it's gone. I was reading Sly's story of pigging out to gain weight for Cop Land. At first, it was fun but the consequences of it sucked. Exactly. It's nice sometimes to say, "Yes, I will have dessert with that." Or "I'll do a hard workout tomorrow. Tonight, I want to just lay around like a slug." But once you become a slug, it's not fun anymore.
But I am christening 2013 as a year of second chances. A year to take the lessons one has learned and actually apply them in a sensible way. A time to turn off the Eeyore and turn on the Tigger. (Well, minus some of the impulsivity, since that has gotten me into big trouble in times past. But you know what I mean.) A time to look before I leap and make better decisions instead of shrugging and saying, "Seems legit." LOL. Or "I want this (whatever) to work so damn bad that I will ignore all warning signs and plow on full steam ahead." A time to say that if something isn't good enough, it needs to go. A time to rebuild my body and get out of the victim mentality. Victor, not victim. A time to eat muscle chow, not junk. I know changes with my work situation and my training will not occur overnight. But as I said in the last post, I got time.
The past 2 years have been, well, the shits. My doctor is trying to figure out if I have an adrenal issue or if I'm worn out from chronic stress. Either way, it's not a wonder. Whatever the case may be, I think 2013 will be better because I don't feel desperate. I know a solution will present itself for a job change and I know my base of strength will come back. Not immediately, but soon. That's good enough for me.
Tonight was one for the best NYEs I've had. Jon and I went out and had a lot of laughs. I got checked out by this guy who was smokin' hot. He had Daniel Craig's Casino Royale body with Vampire Bill's face. You could bounce quarters off this guy's pecs. And believe me, I thought about it! :) I even managed to go home with some Marvel dolls, which is pretty cool.
Quotes:
J: Do you even know Dr. Doom's first name?
S: Victor.
Jon looks in utter astonishment.
J: Are they a gay couple?
S: Yes.
S: The DJ looks like Michael J Fox.
J: He might be smaller than Michael J Fox. He looks tiny enough to sit on the turntable and spin.
J: Muslim Mike and Hindu Harry.
S: How about no.
J: I cried about that! Now I am laughing. What is wrong with me?
S: No idea.
J: I thought that was his girlfriend.
S: I thought it was his daughter.
J: OK, it was his daughter. And that's his extended cab truck where he will show you his extended cab. Ya happy now?
S: Yes.
J: I'm sore. I didn't warm up properly before we played skee-ball.
S: Oh my God.
J: Just wait til you're 43. Or 42. Whatever age I am. I don't even know.
J: The party bus showed up with the kids.
S: Yeah, and just when they started playing Bieber.
J: Did she leave bruises when they took blood? Do you look like a heroin user?
S: Nah, it just looks like I was bitten by a snake.
J: Do you like a man in a bowtie?
S: No.
J: Do you think that guy wearing one is a virgin?
S: Quite probably. And an insufferable hipster.
