More to think about

But this time in a much different way.

There is really no way to intro this entry so I'll cut to the chase: I am pretty sure one of my friends either has an eating disorder or, at a minimum, could benefit from some level of counseling. I have known for a while now that there were issues going on beneath the surface but I am worried at this point that things are getting worse and worse. I had wondered with this being resolution time if she would either start yet another wackadoo diet and/or would start using diet pills for the thousandth time. Sadly, I can tell something is up and I am worried about it. The last time I was around her she was fidgety, jittery and absent-minded-- and I know from past experiences that when she gets this way, it is a sign that she's abusing diet pills, abusing caffeine pills, eating according to some bizarre diet plan or a combo of all of the above. She is not aware of it but I have also known for a while that she is both a binge eater and a sneak eater. On at least two separate occasions, I have watched her pig out and then go to the bathroom and vomit. Confronting her is never successful. She will sit there with a package of diet pills and/or caffeine pills in her damn purse and tell you, "Oh, I am not taking anything. That phase of my life is over with. I don't do that anymore, I swear." Meanwhile, it's like, either you think I am stupid or you are so far in denial that you think everyone else is, too. The sneak eating habit is also becoming more obvious. She will eat tiny, unsurvivable-on portions in front of people and then gorge when she believes no one else is around. She has taken to putting diet and caffeine pills into other bottles so that it appears she is taking Advil or Tylenol for a headache when in actuality, she is popping some unhealthy concoction. I worry about her because no one is getting any younger. That is one of the motivations I had for my own journey into the world of fitness: God help me, I do not want to be middle-aged and having to take 10 different medications every morning just to survive. I don't want to be on diabetes meds, high blood pressure pills, high cholesterol pills, etc., etc. I wasn't in horrible shape when I started this lifestyle change. If the definition of obesity is being 100 lbs or more overweight then I was nowhere near obesity. If I'd lost 100 lbs, I would be sitting here as nothing but a skeleton and a few internal organs. I just wanted to look a little better and feel a little better and, well, challenge myself to find the inner athlete. But this does not involve starving, purging, pills, laxatives, fad diets, and so on. When people ask me what I've been doing and I tell them, "Healthy eating and regular, challenging exercise," they always look so disappointed that I cannot give them some magic secret, LOL. So it is with my friend. She does not eat in a healthy way and she does not exercise in a healthy way. In my mind, loading your body with a legal version of speed, binge eating in secret and then trying to have some 4 hour workout bender is a recipe for death. I can't force her to seek treatment and I don't want to constantly harp on the topic in front of her because I know that won't make anything better. I have been reading some information (this is a good article: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/eating_disorder_treatment.htm) and I guess all I can do is try to be supportive without being judgmental and remind her that I am here as a friend and that I do care.

Heavy sigh


Life is tough sometimes.